Hey Jada, what a privilege to keep learning lessons as we navigate our nomadic lives. I've been thinking about you and I'll write about our 'travelling swivel' in the next week or so. Like you, our plans have changed and rather than feel disappointed, we're excited about the next stage of our current adventure. I always called myself a control freak, but I now understand that I was trying so hard to keep myself safe. In doing so, I wasn't allowing myself to experience anything new and life was limited. Now, I'm relaxing control, feeling unsettled at times, but going with it. I'm proud that at 68 and 74, we're travelling around in our van and on our boat and not conforming to a settled life. It's not the perfect life (lots of people think it is) but it's teaching me something new every week and I'm grateful for that. We must come to Madeira and do some of those hikes!
Karen, I so agree with what you say in your comment. There is so much to learn about life and about ourselves when we let go of that control knob for a bit! Life can then serve up some pretty amazing things. I look forward to hearing all about your adventures as well! Life done in this way is a blessing and like you, Iām grateful everyday for living it in an unconventional way! As adventurous as you both are, you would love Madeira!
I have been dipping in and out of your soulful, beautiful and practical work from the shadows for some months. Each post is relevant to myself. To date I have been unable to finish your posts, my panicked and frozen self hasnt been able to bear the relevance or the comfort your considered words and perspective offer. Today I finished this post and quietly cried ! Not through choice, I have recently lost everthing in my outer world, home, salaried work, vehicle and all that you lose when catapulted suddenly into such upheavel. During my flight I have become fragmented and having landed find I am lost, navigating an unrecognisble landscape and self. Thank you from my shadows, for help in drawing me toward the light ! What a wonderful gift you have in your written word ! Liz š
Well Liz, this made me cry. I am sorry for your sudden losses. That has to be unbearable at times. I wish you continued strength and healing and compassion for all your life transitions. Shadow work is never easy, but it is always worth the effort. The light in me sees the light in you. š«
Kept thinking about this. "The untethering was about something more interior" ā yes. But for some women living abroad, the untethering wasn't chosen. It was the immigration itself. You didn't exit the plan; the plan couldn't cross the border with you. You've been improvising ever since. The voice underneath the planning arrived not because you got quiet enough, but because the noise was already in another language.
Thanks for sharing! I have been really enjoying reading your Substack! I retired a couple of months ago and am waiting for my daughter to graduate high school and for my husband to retire in two years before we launch into our nomad adventures. Thinking about the way it will feel to be untethered from the house, the status quo, etc. Definitely know there will be moments of grief and sadness but Iām excited about all the possibilities and the freedom to just live and experience all the beauty in the world. Your pictures are lovely and I canāt wait to take some of those unplanned hikes!
What a lovely comment. Thank you Debbie! Timing is tricky to coordinate all the pieces for sureā¦ and there is grief and sadness while letting go, so prepare for that and start the process early if you can to take your time going through possessions. Canāt wait for you to take your own pictures too on your unplanned hikes šš»
Greetings from another midlife nomad in Montevideo, Uruguay. I untethered last year--sold the house, the car, and most of my posessions and left the US for exploration and adventures in a new, unfamiliar land. It's amazing to see how life unfolds when we take off the masks and listen to our inner voice, which I had supressed for a long time because the noise of everyday life was relentless and demanded most of the attention. You're absolutely right--the inner voice is not loud, and learning to listen to it again takes patience and trust.
I'm not sure I will ever be able to sell everything and live a nomadic life but I do agree that on those days when you listen to that inner voice and just "go with the flow", they can turn out to be the best days. This happened a few years ago during a visit to Porto. We took the train to Aviero, on the advice of our tour guide we had met and had a wonderful day. We took a local bus to the coast and witnessed the most beautiful late day rain and sun mix on the beach. I'm a painter and I still paint from those photos. Truly a magical day that was definitely not planned!
Aveiro is such a beautiful place! We did something similar when in Porto. Hopped on a train and explored Aviero for a few days. Those flow days are often special gifts šš»
It's always nice to read you. And it's great that you're reaping the fruits of your long-standing role as a mother. I'm also proud of all the women who are such living examples to their daughters.
Hey Jada, what a privilege to keep learning lessons as we navigate our nomadic lives. I've been thinking about you and I'll write about our 'travelling swivel' in the next week or so. Like you, our plans have changed and rather than feel disappointed, we're excited about the next stage of our current adventure. I always called myself a control freak, but I now understand that I was trying so hard to keep myself safe. In doing so, I wasn't allowing myself to experience anything new and life was limited. Now, I'm relaxing control, feeling unsettled at times, but going with it. I'm proud that at 68 and 74, we're travelling around in our van and on our boat and not conforming to a settled life. It's not the perfect life (lots of people think it is) but it's teaching me something new every week and I'm grateful for that. We must come to Madeira and do some of those hikes!
Karen, I so agree with what you say in your comment. There is so much to learn about life and about ourselves when we let go of that control knob for a bit! Life can then serve up some pretty amazing things. I look forward to hearing all about your adventures as well! Life done in this way is a blessing and like you, Iām grateful everyday for living it in an unconventional way! As adventurous as you both are, you would love Madeira!
I have been dipping in and out of your soulful, beautiful and practical work from the shadows for some months. Each post is relevant to myself. To date I have been unable to finish your posts, my panicked and frozen self hasnt been able to bear the relevance or the comfort your considered words and perspective offer. Today I finished this post and quietly cried ! Not through choice, I have recently lost everthing in my outer world, home, salaried work, vehicle and all that you lose when catapulted suddenly into such upheavel. During my flight I have become fragmented and having landed find I am lost, navigating an unrecognisble landscape and self. Thank you from my shadows, for help in drawing me toward the light ! What a wonderful gift you have in your written word ! Liz š
Well Liz, this made me cry. I am sorry for your sudden losses. That has to be unbearable at times. I wish you continued strength and healing and compassion for all your life transitions. Shadow work is never easy, but it is always worth the effort. The light in me sees the light in you. š«
I know the voice well. It is subtle. You must trust yourself enough to listen.
Kept thinking about this. "The untethering was about something more interior" ā yes. But for some women living abroad, the untethering wasn't chosen. It was the immigration itself. You didn't exit the plan; the plan couldn't cross the border with you. You've been improvising ever since. The voice underneath the planning arrived not because you got quiet enough, but because the noise was already in another language.
Thatās a great point too, Alicia. There is a very real untethering with being an immigrant in a strange land in itself.
Thank you for sharing. Itās give me courage to go forward with my own plans š
Love that šš»
Thanks for sharing! I have been really enjoying reading your Substack! I retired a couple of months ago and am waiting for my daughter to graduate high school and for my husband to retire in two years before we launch into our nomad adventures. Thinking about the way it will feel to be untethered from the house, the status quo, etc. Definitely know there will be moments of grief and sadness but Iām excited about all the possibilities and the freedom to just live and experience all the beauty in the world. Your pictures are lovely and I canāt wait to take some of those unplanned hikes!
What a lovely comment. Thank you Debbie! Timing is tricky to coordinate all the pieces for sureā¦ and there is grief and sadness while letting go, so prepare for that and start the process early if you can to take your time going through possessions. Canāt wait for you to take your own pictures too on your unplanned hikes šš»
Greetings from another midlife nomad in Montevideo, Uruguay. I untethered last year--sold the house, the car, and most of my posessions and left the US for exploration and adventures in a new, unfamiliar land. It's amazing to see how life unfolds when we take off the masks and listen to our inner voice, which I had supressed for a long time because the noise of everyday life was relentless and demanded most of the attention. You're absolutely right--the inner voice is not loud, and learning to listen to it again takes patience and trust.
Everything you said is exactly true Kevin! Itās different when you let go and allow what is possible to flow in! š«
I'm not sure I will ever be able to sell everything and live a nomadic life but I do agree that on those days when you listen to that inner voice and just "go with the flow", they can turn out to be the best days. This happened a few years ago during a visit to Porto. We took the train to Aviero, on the advice of our tour guide we had met and had a wonderful day. We took a local bus to the coast and witnessed the most beautiful late day rain and sun mix on the beach. I'm a painter and I still paint from those photos. Truly a magical day that was definitely not planned!
Aveiro is such a beautiful place! We did something similar when in Porto. Hopped on a train and explored Aviero for a few days. Those flow days are often special gifts šš»
Just wanted to say I really enjoyed reading this essay, your thoughts perspective experienceā¦ and the photos!:)
Thank you! I appreciate the comment and glad you liked the photos. It was a beautiful hike. šš»
It's always nice to read you. And it's great that you're reaping the fruits of your long-standing role as a mother. I'm also proud of all the women who are such living examples to their daughters.
Hello Natalija! How nice to hear from you! Thank you for such a nice comment. Itās definitely been a lovely visit. š¤